Testimonies

I decided after feeling led to write some of my experiences with God , in the hopes that they would perhaps be a source of encouragement to others. These are true experiences I have had, Never let anyone convince you that God isn't real, as nothing could be further from the truth! 

What is God like? From my experiences he is many things ,and I have trouble trying to put words to describing him, He is the all-powerful almighty God of everything but he is also a loving father,In Jesus he is like a best friend, he is kind, patient, humble and caring. God is absolutley wonderful.

In Galatians 5:22 the fruits of the spirit are listed as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. From my experiences that is exactly what he is like.

God is smile that you can't see...
 

Some Of My Experiences With God
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The first time I ever experienced hearing from God was when I was 7 years old, it was shortly before christmas and I was looking at all the toys in what used to be called the sears christmas wish book. i'm not sure if that is still around now, but being excited I went through the catalog and circled all the toys I wanted, I figured out that I would need $1000 to buy all these toys. My parents had given me a lottery ticket so I started to pray to God that he would allow me to win $1000 on that ticket so I could buy them all.

After many days of prayer- in my mind he asked me what about $500? I told him that it wasn't enough that I needed $1000. He never said anything after that, but I waited excitedly for the day of the draw convinced that I was going to win. The draw came I looked at the winning numbers and discovered I had lost.

The next time I heard from God was many years later while I was in jail for some petty crimes, It was the first day there, and while I was standing in my cell scared, he said to me." I was with you before and I am with you now."

Many years later after that I was at a shopping mall and as I was leaving I heard the tail end of a song on the mall speakers. I didn't know what the song was but it stuck with me, when I got home I found the song on the internet and listened to it. I burned it on cd, downloaded the video, and for a few weeks felt compelled to listen to it over and over, it was than that I truly started to seek him. I read the bible, I prayed, I hung around various christian-chat boards day and night, I sincerely and honestly sought him and still nothing happened.

However One Verse From The Bible Stuck With Me..James 5:16  i'll post it below...

James 5:16

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective

I kept seeking him, and while at a christian chatboard really just watching people type ,a Girl out of the blue suddenly posted that verse to me..Things started to happen after that, I was downstairs in my kitchen making cofee and God asked me three questions... Here is what I wrote about it at the time it happened...

may 10 2007
last night I was talking to him, strongly asking him to be real. to show himself to me,and I think he asked me questions, so fast in my mind, not like reading a question till you hear the end of it but more like in split second intervals I knew what they were without them having to be finished..I told him I would be his always for ever
that I wanted him, I cant remember them all now.. but I feel like he is here with me as I write this, I can feel him smile.its like hes reading over my shoulder at what im writing.

After that I was reading proverbs chapter 3 and  God revealed himself to me..The bible Lit up for me for the first time. It was like God was actually talking to me, it was completly amazing..Now after these experiences I noticed I was starting to develop this feeling of pride and self importance, I prayed to him to help me rid myself of these feelings and to make myself worthier of him, a couple days later I went out for a drive and again was thinking about it, and I started to cry, I went home and really started to cry and I told God I wasn't worthy enough to be saved  to be worthy enough
to come to him I was so full of sorrow and I was crying to him praying, 

While I was, I Felt like my arms where being pulled back it was like I was out of my body and and I was being crucified,my arms where a blue spirit and they were pulled back, my feet were pushed together and I was scared. The thoughts and feeling of crucification were so strong, God let me percieve him, In my mind it was like I was seeing space without stars and in the bottom corner was a circular white cloud,it wasn't completely circular but in it was a smile that you can't see..

Another moment God manifested to me was shortly after I listened to a preaching online about the love of God, I was thinking about the commandment Jesus gave us to love God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind, and I was thinking how can one do that, I didn't just want to say the words but I wanted to truly love him like that, so I started thinking about how I grew in love with past girlfriends and concluded that I did by spending time with them, by telling them my thoughts, sharing things with them, being with them, and over time love was developed.It didn't come instantly like as in a microwave dinner, but by growth, so I thought I would start to apply this to God, 

I felt the desire to pray but also a feeling of resistance,a feeling to not bother but rather to avoid it. (that feeling to avoid praying I've come know is from satan, if you get that feeling as well fight it off and pray! ) you never know when God might reveal himself to you,, pray pray and pray!

anyways I had to force myself to and I started praying and talking to him about what I was thinking and he let me feel his love.. It was to powerful to experience, and I can't express the words to describe it properly. His love is unimaginable,It was like recieving an electric shock but much more intense , the more I told him I loved him the more intense it became, it was so strong I pulled back, that moment made me realize that Gods love is infinite with no limits to its depth or intensity..It was absolutlely indescribable. 

Another time I was in a hotel room and talking to a christian friend of mine online through yahoo messenger, and we were joking around and talking about God, I told her I was going to go for a cofee and before I left the room prayed to God and asked him to show me anything I was doing that was wrong, I got up and left and started to feel an overwhelming sense of how powerful he was, I remember stopping in a parking lot with the realization that God could squish me like a bug if he chose too, 

I suppose it was more of an awareness of just how almighty God was, I started to become scared and went back to my hotel, and started to pray.. When I did I felt him come, like an awareness of his presence. I knew I was before him and I could feel just how powerful he was, I had the thought that he was just showing me only a tiny fraction of his power, I percieved what felt like fingers touching my back pushing me forward so I was full face on the ground before him. And he let me know clearly that I had been using his name in vain while I was talking with my friend,I was terrified and begged him to forgive me, I told him that I didnt understand and said I was sorry.

For Two days after I was still terrified and was very sad as I thought I would always be in a state of terror of him now, but it left and I was ok.

Manifestations Of Jesus
 

I've had many manifestations of our Lord ,once on the sabbath day I felt him come and afterwards had the unmistakable impression of a jewish man being in the room, it was like I could feel the essence of his being.Another time I felt his spirit in me so strong that it was like he was seperate but still part of me, another time was shortly after a big worry session on money and wealth I felt his presence so clear like he was in the room with me, he told me that this (meaning wordly possessions) was all rubbish..

Shortly after the night I felt crucified in the spirit I had talked to him of my trouble understanding the trinity of God, the Father, Son and Holy spirt. My troubles were about the commandment to worship only God and have no other Gods before him, Jesus I knew was my savior but I couldn't at that time grasp the meaning of God as being three parts and yet one, so worried about whether I was to pray to Jesus or not,,one night after that I was talking to friend, and he suddenly let me feel his power, it was the same as when I was before him in the hotel room and when he let me feel his love, he wrote the words JESUS in my mind.In big letters. 

I have felt his finger brush the corner of my head, like a mother does when she touches her baby, I've had moments where I knew he was there, leaning down over me talking to me like one does a 4 year old, recently I've noticed what I think is an angel?(I have no way to know this)  say amen in my mind before I can finish my prayers, or when I talk of Jesus and tell how you must accept his sacrfice to be saved, AMEN comes. While I was reading the story of stephen, the first martyr, I felt the holy ghost fill me with great sorrow to the point of coming to tears.

One night while driving home sad about a girfriend I had to give up, he told me, Don't worry my son I have someone for you, I feel Gods presence always,at times like im on fire with his spirit other times more distant but always I feel him with me. Always speaking with me, he tells me to trust him, to have faith, when I ask for things, at times I hear him ask me  a question, "do you believe?". he reveals things to me, perceptions and gives me the ability to grow in him.

When I have asked for wealth I've been told that I will live by faith, and to be content with what I have and he will bless me. Just recently he's made me aware that doubting God is a great sin, freeing me much of my fear and worry. Never think you can do anything alone, it is only by him empowering you that you can grow in faith.

There have been other times and experiences I haven't written here. some of them scary (evil is real), but I want you to know if you are reading this, that I'm not making all this up to create a good story for you, God is real, and he is exactly as the bible says, He is a God of infinite power but he is also a God of Infinite love.

The things that stop you from knowing him are your disbelief,your fears. and your unwillingness to give up sin and turn to him. But IF you will sincerely seek him you will find him.
 

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